As a diaper lover, you enjoy wearing diapers – whether the reason is medical or otherwise. You could just find comfort in diapers or you may be sexually gratified by diapers. These preferences can bring up different, confusing feelings. However, you can come to fully accept your love for diapers by understanding why you love them and unpacking your emotions a bit. We explain how to do this below.
Why Do I Want to Wear Diapers?
Diapers aren’t just for babies. They’re worn by teens and adults too – reasons for wanting to wear diapers vary. You may identify with one or more of the explanations below:
Wearing diapers for emotional comfort is common within the diaper loving community. Of course thick, fluffy, cozy diapers are comforting. Diapers can be a really helpful tool for reducing anxiety, as they provide an enveloping sense of security. Teens and adults who are diagnosed with mood disorders also benefit from diaper wearing because they promote relaxation and safety, helping them cope with symptoms of their disorders.
Some people choose to wear diapers for fun! That’s as good a reason as any. Many adult diapers showcase vibrant, colorful prints; plastic-backed models have that ultra-fun crinkly sound; and wearing them can easily turn a regular night at home into a diaper loving party. Whether you love trying out different disposable diapers or have invested in reusable cloth diapers, there’s nothing quite like the feeling you get when your tape tabs are pulled tight or snaps clicked shut.
Sometimes, diaper lovers obtain sexual pleasure from wearing diapers. There is no shortage of sexual fetishes. Just as some people enjoy wearing certain outfits and playing with a wide variety of sex toys, you may be in the camp of those who use diapers during sexual activity. Diapers are soft, comfortable and cradle the sex organs, so it makes sense that those feelings of sexual gratification arise.
Some diaper lovers may have had or currently still have incontinence issues. Adult diapers provide protection against incontinence leaks and tend to be equipped with ultra-absorbent cores that wick moisture away from the skin. Sometimes, having a temporary need for diapers makes a teen or adult realize they find more than protection in their diapers and opt to keep using them after incontinence issues clear up.
How to Understand My Diaper Lover Behaviors?
Most people who identify with the love of diapers discover this behavior at an early age, during preteen years. The behaviors you engage in may include wearing a diaper along with wetting and soiling. People from all walks of life identify as diaper lovers! However, there are two important distinctions in behavior you should understand:
Enjoying the act of wearing and soiling diapers does not necessarily correlate with acting out baby behaviors, as seen with adult babies. Diaper loving can stand alone, without the association with baby items like pacifiers, onesies, and baby blankets. Diaper loving behavior can be as simple as wearing diapers discreetly at home or out in public, while otherwise leading a pretty regular, under the radar lifestyle. Even though diapers may incite sexual feelings, that doesn’t mean that a diaper lover engages in baby behaviors.
Adult babies enjoy acting like babies and being cared for as if they were babies. They engage in behaviors like suckling from a baby bottle, watching cartoons while playing with baby toys, and even sleeping inside a crib. This may be an attractive set of behaviors you either currently engage in or may choose to try on for size. However, it is perfectly okay if you enjoy diaper loving behaviors without engaging in adult baby fantasies.
If you enjoy both sets of behaviors, you likely identify with the term Adult Baby Diaper Lover (ABDL).
How to Feel Less Alone as a Diaper Lover?
It’s super important to recognize you’re not alone. If you’re experiencing feelings of alienation or confusion surrounding your preferences, you must know that other teens and adults from different backgrounds share in your diaper loving preferences. You are certainly not the only person who has these feelings and who exhibits these behaviors. If no one has told you this, please read the next line carefully: there is nothing abnormal or wrong with you.
There are entire online communities devoted to exploring and chatting about the diaper lover lifestyle. These are safe havens for other people like you where you get to read about and connect with others who are going through all the phases you’re going through. Meeting people who are not only willing to understand you but also share in your interests can feel like a massive weight lifting from your shoulders! Whenever you’re feeling lonely, reach out and connect with someone in the diaper lover online space – you’re sure to feel tons better.
How to Tap Into Your Feelings as a Diaper Lover?
Sometimes, negative feelings arise when you explore an unpopular or misunderstood personal interest or preference. You may feel weird about your pursuits, wondering just how your love of diapers originated. Although you may think to push these thoughts and feelings away, try taking time to just sit with those feelings. They’re just feelings – they’re not facts. Don’t let them have power over you. Then, move into identifying all the positive feelings surrounding being a diaper lover. Do you feel comfort? Security? Pleasure? Fantastic. Anchor yourself into all the great feelings that come from your preferences.
When negative feelings pop up, take another moment to notice and acknowledge them, and remember they’re not facts. Then, remind yourself again of all the positive feelings you get from being a diaper lover. With enough practice, this process becomes automatic and you can eradicate any negativity surrounding your diaper loving nature. If you enjoy writing, journaling is a wonderful way to get all your feelings out – and, as time goes by, you’ll have a solid measure of your emotional progress to turn to! This can be extra motivating for tough days when you need a gentle, loving reminder that you’re awesome.
How to Deal With Guilt and Shame as a Diaper Lover?
As a diaper lover, you may experience difficult feelings, like guilt and shame. Sometimes, self-criticism takes over and you become fearful of others finding out and misjudging you. However, when you want to connect with others and have them understand you, it’s important you spend some time understanding yourself. Although there is nothing wrong with your lifestyle as a diaper lover, you may feel guilty, as if you’re violating some unspoken moral code. Shame is often closely related to guilt and could come up for you as a result of embarrassment and feelings of powerlessness. This is especially true for diaper lovers who have attempted to share their interests with others and have been rejected or disapproved of.
Although it can be really tough to receive any kind of negative feedback, you must remember guilt and shame don’t belong to you. You may feel this way for a little while, but you need to work through those feelings so you can continue with the happy and fulfilled life you deserve.
First, understand what guilt is. It’s an emotion that arises when you feel as though you are doing something wrong and bad, like if you’re hurting someone else. Sometimes, guilt comes from engaging in behaviors that hurt you. For example, if you’re working on making better choices around food and you eat a whole chocolate cake by yourself, it’s natural for guilt to set in. Although you’re not hurting someone else, you are breaking the promise you had with yourself and potentially creating a tummy ache. When behavior like this persists, you end up with health issues. So, guilt is a great indicator for when you’re not on the right track. However, sometimes you may feel guilty for something you shouldn’t be feeling guilty for!
So, when feeling guilt around your diaper lover behaviors, ask yourself: “Am I directly hurting anyone else or hurting myself?” If the answer is no, then you know it’s unhealthy, false guilt. Although having this understanding doesn’t immediately erase the guilt, it helps you see it for what it is and process it as such. With time, the guilt will subside and eventually disappear as you learn how to accept yourself and celebrate all your positive feelings.
Second, work on understanding what shame is. Shame is a deeper and more unforgiving feeling. Guilt is what signals you may be doing something bad, but shame is the belief that you, yourself, are bad. Shame can really beat you down so it’s super important you don’t let this feeling in when it comes knocking on your door. If you’ve shared your diaper lover fantasies with someone and they have reacted negatively, this can easily induce shame. However, even if this happens, you must understand how others react and perceive you has nothing to do with you. People have their own set of experiences and perceptions and most are unable to keep an open mind when receiving new information.
When you understand that people will misjudge you and their thinking is due to their own mind, it’s incredibly freeing for you. And the best part of learning who doesn’t accept you? You get to move on to the people who will love and accept you just as you are. In those relationships, there’s no place for shame. So, keep your head up and keep moving forward. There are always better days and better friends ahead.
How to Accept Being a Diaper Lover?
For one, do the things that bring you comfort and settle into the pleasurable feelings you get when you’re wearing your favorite kind of diaper. This experience is for you – let yourself enjoy it. For every person, there is always at least one aspect of themselves they struggle with accepting. What that thing is changes from person to person but know that people aren’t just walking around completely happy and accepting of their full selves all the time. Self-acceptance is a process; it’s a daily habit that over time strengthens you and fills you with confidence.
Take some time to examine any negative feelings that come up for you when you think of wearing diapers. Next, remind yourself who you are. For example, if you’re feeling ashamed because being a diaper lover isn’t widely understood in society, you can remind yourself that conforming to societal expectations isn’t what your life is all about and you can celebrate that you’re strong enough to enjoy life in your own unique lane.
Experiencing pleasure, security, and comfort is completely natural. You deserve all those good feelings! And when your brain starts playing tricks on you, looping through negative thoughts, try this: pretend you’re talking to a friend; how would you help your friend feel better? How would you lift him or her up? You deserve the same kindness you give to others. Never forget that!
How to Talk About Being a Diaper Lover?
When you’re in a like-minded circle, as found in diaper loving online communities, it’s easy and even exciting to talk about common interests. However, when you’re speaking with a close friend or even a lover, it can be tough to navigate the conversation. Use the tips below to simplify this process:
- Explain your behavior is a part of who you are.
- Let them know you’re seeking acceptance.
- If you want to partake in diaper lover behaviors with your lover, be clear about your desires.
- Create boundaries with friends and lovers – be sure you each understand what is and isn’t okay.
- Always employ clear communication and be respectful.
And if you don’t want to share this aspect of yourself with others, you don’t have to. It’s completely up to you!
Choosing privacy or living out loud as a diaper lover is a choice only you can make. Whatever you choose, love yourself throughout your life. There just isn’t enough time in life to spend any of it feeling ashamed for the things that make you happy. Love and celebrate yourself – you are worthy!